Currently in school. No lecture today due to the interim review. Had mine yesterday and it was quite bad. I didn't speak much [unlike the past] as I was told that if I speak much, I complicate my concept. Silly. So I stood there and answer the questions they posted. I knew my concept wasn't strong as my research was limited. Like I said, I know I didn't really put much effort into this project, and now that I'm in this state, I'm angry with myself. I guess I can only blame myself and not anyone or the lecturers. But I did, I really did try hard, not that I'm defending myself. The conclution for the whole interim review is: Jacinta is still the angel. She's the only one who will appreciate my work, or rather effort work. =) Ling Hao told me to chop down trees to study the branches. =/ Faris repeated what Ling Hao said. Copycat, he made it sound like it's another point to take note. I'm on my own for now to improve everything before next Monday hits me to start with the production of the furniture [full stop].
I'm upset, but not totally. I shouldn't have look at the wrong side of this friendship, afterall we are supposed to just build on friendship. I admit that feelings do grow but then again agree that it will fade someday. I'm okie with us just being friends, after all didn't we started off that way? Maybe it's just me for taking some of your words too seriously, that I actually fooled myself. Nothing wrong with you but everything with the way I think. Maybe you shouldn't have let me know more than I should in the first place. Let me live in my world of imagination in the first place, at least I can and have power over my mind, to know that I'm living in a dream and to wake up soon enough. [Sometimes ignorant is a bliss, and I do agree with that statement.] Now that you tell me and that we are just friends, I'm totally lost and confused. Forgive me for not asking to clarify anything. I don't see the need anymore, after all that you've said lately. Nothing much will change, just that I will move and devote all my thoughts towards the pure-friendship-route. I have woken from my silly-ism since the time we left off. I don't hate you but realised the fact that humans like me make silly mistakes too. I've learn a great lesson. With that, I'm glad to know I'm out of it, to face a better tomorrow. Thanks for helping me to wake up from the silly-ism. =) We will still be great friends, won't we? [or at least lie to me, but I know you won't.]
Bottom line, I'm proud to announce that you are my second best-est friend and with that we all know that best friends don't fall for one another. Agree?
I took 4 hours to think of the last paragraph. It isn't a simple thing. But I never regretted letting you know how I feel cause it feels good to know that you know how I feel [full stop].
|10:54 AM|